Have you entered your secret place where it’s just you and God and you didn’t know what to say? Or better yet you
felt like if He was far away. Maybe you felt that He was disappointed in you. What about feeling a complete sense of stillness or that things felt quiet. You find yourself
isolated and strangely this felt good. I think this is a very common feeling. The reality is that
nothing that we do, feel, or say shocks God. He’s just waiting for us to call out to him for help or just to talk. Maybe even a little screaming, crying and unstoppable
sobbing moment because things are not looking too great. God wants us to cast all our cares, weaknesses, worries, hurts, and
disappointments to Him as we ask for his help. We get so concerned with following protocol. Lets’ see, first we go with repentance, then thanksgiving, then praise then…..and yes
this is all absolutely wonderful but sometimes just sometimes we can go straight to Him and cry. The sobbing kind of cry that screams, “Lord, help me”, I need you to
intervene”, “please change this around”, “I just don’t have the strength” or “I’m feeling weak, please give me strength”.
Sometimes there’s a feeling of being unworthy and sometimes you may feel guilty.
I know I have, but it was recently put into perspective by one of my son’s. He
said, “mom, I sometimes don’t feel worthy”, “I start doing what is right before God and then a week later, I fail Him”. I do what I don’t want
to do again.” I smiled at him and said, “son, we don’t go to Jesus qualified, we go to Jesus and He qualifies us by His precious blood.” The bible
says that “there is no one good, not one.” To put it into perspective, the Bible says, ” that our righteousness is as filthy rags.” I think that there are many reasons
why we feel so unworthy at times. It could be due to a lack of a consistent prayer life or a lack of reading the scriptures. It could be a lack of surrendering in an area of weakness,
a sin that we struggle with, our disappointments, a lack of trust in others, or simply not finding the answers in scripture to our questions.
Ultimately, I think we often feel unworthy when we know that we have fallen short and we think, “How is God going to fix this now?, “why would He choose me? I’m such
a mess. “
There’s other reasons why we may feel unworthy, like being distracted with the affairs of life, being over worked or the feeling of being pulled in so many directions.
Many of us wear many hats. As women, we wear: the mom hat, the wife hat, the daughter hat, the friend hat, the full-time employee hat, the entrepreneur hat, ,the maid hat, the cook hat, the cleaning specialist hat (not funny but funny), the
problem solving hat, the financial hat, the care-taker hat, the professional shopper hat, the house management hat and the mail sorter hat. You get the point. Sometimes, we are so
caught up with all our responsibilities that we forget to care for ourselves both spiritually and physically. We often forget about the self-care hat.
We have learned to say “yes” to every request when we need to say, “NO” and be okay with saying “No, I can’t right now.”
As women, we feel obligated to do all the above and still find time to exercise, stay fit, go to wellness checks, and make healthy habit changes.
Woman are usually so busy being super woman that they leave themselves for last. The result of this is that we begin to distance ourselves from people and sometimes even from God. I know
I have felt like getting in a car, jumping on a plane and going to an island at an undisclosed location just to get away from it all. And from talking to friends, I know I’m not the only one.
The good news is that we don’t have to stay in that dark place for too long. We don’t stay there because we Love God so much and we absolutely know that God loves us, He fights for us and
He is for us.
In Psalm 20:4 it says,” the Lord will fulfill all His purpose for our lives”. It even says in Psalm 27:13 ” I would have lost hope if I hadn’t believed that I would see the
goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.”
So what should we do?
I have found that listing all your concerns and setting goals for change is a great place to start. Without a plan, your goals are just dreams. We have to learn to
manage our activities. If there’s too much on our plate, we must learn to let it go and be at peace with our decisions! We don’t need to explain ourselves to people
because those in your closest circle know exactly what you are going through. They love you, pray for you, and are your tribe. Next, establish healthy boundaries
with friends, family, and others. Be very clear on what you allow and do not allow in your life. Trust me, you will feel absolutely amazing when you begin and set boundaries.
Next, take it to the Lord in prayer.
Set an assigned time every day and pray, “Lord, I’m a sinner who needs a Savior. Forgive me for falling short. Forgive me for not managing my activities wisely.
Help me to change. I have so many things that I want to do and I need Your direction and guidance in prioritizing each and every goal. Your Word says that you order my steps,
that you plant my feet on an even and wide place. You even pluck my feet from out of the net. You have made me fearfully and wonderfully made as the thoughts you have toward me
are as endless as the grains of sand. Your Word goes even farther and says, “No weapons formed against me shall prosper and every word that rises up against me in judgement, you
condemn. Knowing this brings an immediate smile to my face.
In addition, I tell the Lord, ‘I don’t want to live a day without Your presence. You are the reason i smile, the reason I live and my blessed hope. You are the reason I wake up every morning
knowing that my family are safe in Your hands. I know that all things really do work out for my good because I know that you have chosen me for such a time as this. I may feel overwhelmed at
times but I know that if and when I go to you, you will guide and direct me.
So what else can we do you may ask? I encourage you to crack open your bibles daily and read a chapter from the Psalm or Proverbs as a daily vitamin. Then proceed to read a chapter in the
New testament and or the Old testament. Each time that you read a book, go to the Books of the Bible index and highlight the book that you have read with a colorful highlighter. This will be
so motivating as week by week and month by month you will see all the books that you have read . Soon you will have read the entire Bible. It usually takes about 1 year to 1 1 /2 years to read.
The bible is not like any other book. It’s alive. It will change you. It’s a book where you meditate on the verses and reflect on what is being said, the timeline, and the context.
I take notes on a journal and write on post it notes. The Holy Spirit will reveal the Word to you.
As we continue to seek Him in the Word and in prayer, our hearts & mind will begin to change and the feeling of unworthiness will fade.
I hope this is of encouragement. God bless you!
Sister in Christ, Much Love,
Karly